Clinical Rebirth: Why You Should Never Hide the Mistakes You Made

I have spent 41 years on this planet, 21 of them married to my absolute rock. I called myself ‘The Singing Shimmers‘ because I wanted my music to be a reflection of the light that refuses to dim, even when the darkness is overwhelming.

But I have to be raw with myself, and more importantly, with you. The dawn was dormant for a very long time.

For forty-one years, I was at a quiet crossroads.

The Silence of the Crossroads

You have read about the stroke. You know about the Lupus Nephritis, the creeping shadow of blindness, and the kidney failure that made my very existance feel entirely fucking worthless. Those things are true. They are the kinds of shadows that try to steal your voice, to convince you that your only purpose is to break.

And I need to know if you’ve ever felt that, too. Have you ever been in that clinical space where you feel entirely unpolished and raw, a final audit of your own soul?

I was. It was a private, unglamorous battlefield. The decided decision was made: I Continue.

The Musi

My return was not a whisper; it was an emotional explosion. My unique blend of music-inspired folk emerged from that same fight.

I used music to process every single battle.

My Goth Rock track, ‘After the Sickness‘, is not a performance. It’s a visceral descent. It’s about that transition from a grey fog of depression into an aggressive wall of sound. It features an actual SOS Morse code pulse—not as a gimmick, but as a real-time signal sent from the edge of a mental breakdown.

This is where I reach out to you: When my world was falling apart, the heavy climaxes and unrefined distortion of music became my only sanctuary. I realized that the Great Spirit was whispering to me.

The Manifesto of Authenticity: Hiding Nothing

And this is the most important part. I called myself The Singing Shimmers to be a reflection of that resilient light.

I need to make this promise to you. I will never hide the mistakes I make.

In the middle of ‘After the Sickness,’ I mess up. My voice glitches. The rhythm skips. I completely stumble and forget my own damn lyrics. It’s a raw, unpolished moment.

My husband Devil, who produced the track, told me to re-record it. He said, ‘No one needs to hear that.’

I said, ‘Keep it.‘

Why hide the mistakes I made? This song is about a mental breakdown. There WILL be mistakes in a mental breakdow, right? If I’m not allowed to stumble when my world is falling apart, then what’s the point? If my story is about surviving kidney failure, a stroke, and blindness, then a vocal glitch is the most authentic part of the story.

We Stumble, and We Sing

My website is a clinical space, yes, a high-grade audit. But it is also a place for unpolished, unrefined reality. This is not about numbers on a page; it’s about this connection. If my journey has touched yours in any way, then I have to be real with you. Every comment, every share, and every ‘Yes’ is a decision you are making with me.

This post isn’t just about a stroke survivor or a musician. It’s about a Shimmer that refuses to dim.

I am not at a crossroads anymore; I am on the pathway back. I found my breath on this beautiful land, realizing that four-legged medicine can show us true beauty. If I made it this far, if I did it, YOU CAN TOO. Never give up.

Thank you for being my light. The clinical rebirth is finished. We continue the climb, mistakes and all.

With all my love, Shimmers 🎙️❤️